I’ve always had a relationship with the Lord since I was a child. Growing up I remember my church having a close relationship with a local Jewish synagogue. As such we ended up having joint holiday services alternating between our sanctuary and the synagogue; taking turns every year. This should have solidified my faith in Jesus and strengthened it that much more, but instead it ended up leaving me utterly confused while being completely theologically twisted and turned around.
The point of contention in my mind was that in the Christian faith we believe that Jesus is the true Son of the Living God. Where in contrast the Jewish faith just1 saw Jesus as a wise rabbi by whom we could learn many lessons from his example in life and ministry. In effect this led to a time in my life when I questioned whether Jesus was the Son of God, or just an example of a teacher and rabbi. Being completely broken mentally, physically and theologically brought me to my knees in unceasing prayer. The question had to be answered and there was a determination inside me to get results no matter what.
I started praying for the answer with relentless conviction. I began getting down on my knees every waking hour of the day and night. My prayers were going up to heaven like a lost child hysterically searching for their parents wanting to be found so they can return home. I had been knocking at heaven’s door for months. During a sermon at church, I had this feeling that someone was staring directly at me. Like someone’s eyes were looking through me. The gaze upon me was piercing my entire being. I could even feel it in my very soul. You know that feeling: where someone is looking at you and somehow you know exactly where it’s coming from and you have no choice left, but to snap your head in that direction towards the person that very instance.
There were four tall vertical rectangular windows with approximately six inches of spacing between each window on the wall facing towards the main boulevard. When I looked over towards the windows there was a Man standing there sideways with His shoulder closest toward the window. He wasn’t standing in view of the first window pane, but in the second. No sooner than I turned my head to glance over did He turn His head away to look straight forward so I could not see His face. His clothes shined radiant like they were light itself and were so intensely white, as no one on earth could bleach them so bright.
Then He took a step forward into the view of the third window pane where in a blink of an eye He immediately vanished. The impact and realization of what happened didn’t fully compute and hit me, but I did cease in my persistent prayers. Though I had directly been answered and had seen for myself the Son of the Living God for some reason it didn’t completely register as to what I had been privileged to have been witness to.
One day I received a call from a person who had an experience that was troubling to them as they explained. They had flat lined on the table at the hospital. There was no heart beat and they were clinically dead. All they saw was complete darkness: no heaven, no bright light, no Jesus, and no kingdom of heaven, just nothingness. Eventually the medical team was able to bring them back to life. They continued to ask me about my faith and why I believe in God. After telling them in detail about the vision I had at church; I could feel the Holy Spirit encompassing me. It was a hot day outside. Yet my entire body was covered in goosebumps and I wasn’t cold in the slightest bit. All of the sudden there was a proverbial click that happened in my brain. I just witnessed that I had seen Jesus Christ. He had answered my prayers and revealed Himself to me directly. I knew the truth. Though I couldn’t explain it and I still to this day have the lingering question: “Why me?”.
The vision I had changed my life and the path that I was on. Ever since my awakening I have felt an intense calling to be a faithful disciple and minister of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. My Savior has called me to be a witness and I shall not be silenced. Though life may tear us down through many trials and tribulations; as long as you’re standing on Jesus as your firm foundation He can and will rebuild you in ways that you never imagined. Jesus is calling and can turn those shattered pieces into a work of art if you’ll let Him. Will you answer His call? In wanting to be faithful to my calling I became a Licensed and Ordained Chaplain along with a Licensed and Ordained Minister through Christian Leaders Alliance. I’m being rebuilt for servant leadership and ministry. Let your life be all to the glory of God; His will be done.